Why didn't I think of that?

I need some help with this one.  Some understanding really.  There is a phenomenon that occurs in some people's brains that prompts them to repeat what they hear.  I understand certain applications of this phenomenon.  Generally the intentional uses of this as a tool.  When someone introduces themselves to you, you may repeat their name back to them like so:

Person A:  "I'm Jim".

Person B:  "Nice to meet you, Jim".

This is useful technique when trying to remember someone's name later.  There are those who say it files the name in the brain in a more retrievable place.  Unfortunately my brain seems to be a very disorganized packrat, and looses information despite its filing process.  But this is another matter, and I do believe that this works for many people.

There is the application of repeating information to confirm that you heard the person right, or that the information they communicated was really what they meant to say.  This is often used to better personal relationships, and is probably taken straight from the psychiatrist's office:

Patient:  "My neighbor's dog used to scare me when I was young".

Doctor:  "So you were afraid of your neighbor's dog"?

Patient:  "Well, maybe not so much afraid as just bothered by".

Doctor:  "What was your relationship with your mother"?

OK, maybe I just added that last line for the Freudians out there, but you get how this application could be deemed useful.

Then, there is always the legitimate situation that the person on the other end of the conversation didn't actually hear the speaker:

Rowdy ballgame attendee 1:  "The hotdog vendor is coming through"!

Rowdy ballgame attendee 2:  "Oh!  The hotdog guy is coming"!

That happens.  

But there are a few applications that seem unconscious and bothersome.  Two specifically that I can think of at the moment.  I would like to understand them better because, frankly, they annoy me to no end.  

The first and less annoying version of this seems to be a lack of conversation ammo.  My aunt is a master of this application.  On a blistery windy day, we might tumble in the door shivering and exclaim, "It's COLD out there"!  To which she would respond, "Oh, is it cold"?  Uh... yeah.  I think that's what I said.  It's cold out there.  This variation can be applied to anything.  It is the oral equivalent to sentences that contain redundancies like, "introducing myself for the first time" (which I almost did earlier in this post, but AHA! I caught myself.),  or something like "the motor died and wouldn't start".  Any minimalist surely understands my angst here.

The second and painfully annoying version of the repeat talker is the one who repeats a statement, particularly after a lengthy conversation has just occurred surrounding such statement, as if it were their own thought.  This makes me absolutely, certifiably, rip-roaring crazy.  It happens in my world with alarming frequency too.  

Does this happen to other people?  Does it happen to you?  Do you do such a thing?  I will have to speechlessly wiggle my finger at you in frustration if you do, but I would eventually calm down and be extremely grateful to you if you could give even the smallest bit of insight as to what is rolling around in your thoughts that might drive you to say such things.

For those of you blissfully clueless to this upsetting phenomenon, allow me to trouble you with an example that just happened to me recently:

I work in a friendly office.  One that doesn't frown on the occasional doorway chat.  Lucky me.  My boss comes out of his office to discuss how he feels good about having started an important letter even though  he hasn't gotten very far.  I casually congratulated him saying that "starting is the hardest part".  To which he responded so characteristically with "well,.. yeah".  (imagine him using the same tone of voice you would use to say "well, duh").  From there we proceeded to have a 5 minute conversation about how even if we don't know where we're going with a project, if we just start it, no matter how small a start it is, the direction of the project unfolds in the mind and it's easier to finish it.  We enjoyed our like-mindedness on this topic until he departed.

Now my coworker, who is in the very next cube to me, definitely does not have a hearing problem.  She also was not excluded from this conversation despite her silence during the actual discourse between me and my boss.  After my boss left the area, for some mysterious reason, she chose to say to me, "well, I think starting is the hardest part".  

I have no response to this.  The nicest thing I can muster out of my vocal chords at this point is "mmm".  You see, in my head I'm saying, "Really?!  Why that's a fascinating and original observation!  How insightful of you!  Why didn't I think of that"?

Procrastination as easy as 1,2...

It seems that a fair number of my favorite blogs are talking about procrastination today.  I am an expert on this subject and feel I would be remiss not to share my knowledge with the gentlereaders out there.  

Let me start by addressing all those naysayers who claim that productivity is really the desirable goal.  

Pfft.  

Unfortunately I doubt a productive person would understand the compelling argument of the "pfft", so I'm sure I'll have to spell this out for them.  Productivity is a fine trait for the common man.  It is the working man's bread and butter, and contains intrinsic value as any decent virtue does.  Procrastination is an artform zen-like in nature.  The more you work at it, the more elusive it seems.  If one can allow the spirit of procrastination to come through them, it becomes as natural as breathing, and in many years time, the student of procrastination becomes a master and thought is no longer necessary to practice their craft.  

I humbly tell you, gentlereader, that I have become a grandmaster of procrastination.  Do not gape in admiration, for I'm here to tell you that if I can do it, so can you.  While difficult to express that which is no longer given a thought in my mind, I will attempt to teach you too how to "be" the procrastination.  I think the easiest way to do this is by example.  Here are a few examples of how to combat the droll instructions of the productivist.  

zenhabits offers a list of ways to be productive.  Let me offer my own response to a few of their "ways".  

The Productivist Says:

Focus for five minutes.  The hardest part is getting started.  If you can commit to focusing on a project for five minutes, you will often find that when that first five minutes is up you'll feel like you can continue on with  your project for another 5 or 15 or 20 minutes.

The Procrastinator Says:

That's a great idea.  I'll just finish up this blog post and maybe do that after dinner some time.

The Productivist Says:

Decide on the next action.  When faced with an intimidating task, break it down into small specific chunks to tackle.

The Procrastinator Says:

Oh goody!  I love making lists!  I'll break it all down and put it in Excel and make a pretty chart because pretty things make me happy.  I'll need to attach it to my email so I can access it wherever I am and tackle something when the mood is right.  Of course then I'll need to update it.  Although my first list is a little outdated at this point, I should reorganize my list...

The Productivist Says:

Play let's make a deal.  Make a promise to yourself that if you do some work on an item you'll give yourself a reward.  

The Procrastinator Says:

I did five minutes of work.  I can reward myself with 5o minutes of tv.  (a master procrastinator rewards themselves with 5 hours of movie marathoning.  A grandmaster procrastinator rewards themselves with 5 days of reading productivity posts).

It may take some getting used to, but with time you'll find your procrastination skills become more and more fine tuned.  I do encourage you to view the full post on zenhabits to see how the other half live.  You'll want to gain a better understanding of what we are up against.  As a fine young G.I once said, "Knowing is half the battle".